Unimaginable Things
Recovery has opened its doors to so many things for me. While it seems like a small change to some, it has completely changed my life ten fold. To simply “stop drinking” sounds easy to those that do not struggle with addiction. “Why can’t you just have one?” is something that I asked myself over and over. And people who can drink normally are absolutely astounding to me! I have a completely different life now that I stopped drinking, and it has enabled me to become a better person all around.
While it hasn’t always been easy, I have support from hubs, which is undeniably the most helpful support there is. He has changed his lifestyle as well and given up things that would normally be a part of his “normie” life. We’ve gone through the entire process together, sometimes struggling along the way. But we are doing it.
I now have a whole different life that I don’t think everyone always sees. I have online support groups that I am a huge part of that no one knows about. I have close friends and confidants that I have never met in person because we all do recovery support online. I have a ton of sober friends from meetings and volunteering that have nothing to do with the other part of my life. It is hard to combine the two lives together. The sober life and the normie life.
The opportunities that are opening up to me are endless. I volunteer for Springs Recovery Connection in the hopes of becoming a certified recovery coach. I make weekly phone calls to people who need peer support. When I reach them, they just like to talk about how they are doing in their path to recovery. It’s nice to know we are not alone in this path.
I sponsor women and do AA meetings, which is a whole other life of its own. I do service work, which is basically volunteer hours, helping plan functions and events throughout the year. I just started this, and am only doing a little bit of work, but feel valued and important so far. I made the flyer for a big upcoming luncheon. Nothing huge, but I feel connected and part of the club.
I also am a Ministry Team Member for MOPS (Mothers of Preschoolers). This is something that is starting in the fall. I did MOPS this past year during COVID, but it has not been how it usually is. Pre-COVID, hundreds of moms get together to connect, eat, talk, and listen to speakers etc. all while the kids are being supervised at day care in the church! However, because of COVID, we simply met as small groups, so the small group is all I know. I met some fantastic women who are good friends now, and they recruited me to be a Ministry Team Member. This means I have a bigger role in MOPS and am a leader for other moms.
Along with this, I do my inspirational and motivational Instagram account as well as this blog. I post everyday, try to interact with similar accounts, do meetings with different groups, and generally try to stay connected through social media. It’s not just mindless scrolling; it actually is somewhat like a job, honestly! I just want to help people; I’ve had people I don’t know reach out to me because of my page, and that is what I LOVE. I strive for that.
Finally, I am (im)patiently waiting for SOMEONE to respond to my query letters that I have sent out. I queried 30+ agents in the hopes that one wants to pick up my book and help me along the way with traditional publishing. The word on the street is that this process can take up to 12 weeks. So I sent most of them out at the end of June. I hope September is my month! Please send prayers and good vibes my way!
I’m doing all of these things because I have to give back in order to keep my sobriety. It sounds like a lot. This is all stuff that I do along with raising the twins and working 20 hours a week! But if I spend as much time focusing on my sobriety and helping others as I did obsessing over alcohol or drinking, then I am doing the right thing.
I would wake up thinking about alcohol, think about which store to go to after work, think about what to get, think about the weekend, think about how to get through until 4:30, think about drinking on the way home, think about that nice relaxing glass at dinner, think about all of it all day long. And then I would follow through. I would go to the liquor stores and drink each night away. I spent hours a day obsessing over alcohol or actually drinking it. So shouldn’t I have hours a day to spend on myself and others?
These groups are bringing things to my life that I never would have imagined. Next year, I am flying across the world to meet my sober mom friends in Bali! I’ve never met them in person; it has only been virtual. But how cool is that? I have these connections that I never would have if I had not started my Instagram and website. I’ve met these women through Instagram, as a group called the Sober Mom Squad. When I was drinking, I never would have imagined I would have friendships like this, especially ones that I haven’t even met in real life! I would have scoffed at the idea of being a Ministry Team Member for MOPS. I didn’t have an open mind, and I was so judgmental. I thought I could do everything on my own, as long as I had my best friend with me...vodka.
I don’t know what my life would be like today if I still drank. Isn’t it weird that one tiny thing is actually such a huge deal? That one thing, alcohol, is just a word to some. Just something that they have once in a while for fun or to relax. For me, it was my world. And it’s insane how my world has changed without it.
